Name: Stanley Johnson
Age: 29
Occupation: Virginia State Trooper
If I could change my name, I’d make it: Stanley M***** F****** Johnson
Pet I’d like to own: German Shepherd
People say I look like: Brad Pitt
Favorite movie of all time: Super Troopers
TV show I never miss: NYPD Blue
The secret to happiness is: One in the head, two in the chest.
One superpower I wish I had: To pull over 4 cars at once
Book on my nightstand: Laws of Virginia
My proudest achievement: Busting President Obama on 58
My most humbling moment: Giving my father a ticket for not signaling when backing out of the driveway.
My life won’t be complete until: I catch every speeder
I really lose my cool when: North Carolina drivers come through my town thinking they own it.
Favorite color: Flashin’ Blue
Best decision I’ve made in life: Tasering that drunk driver in the cruiser backseat
What gives me the blues: A speeding car crossing state lines out of my jurisdiction
Best childhood memory: Playing cops and robbers in my backyard.